Dreams

Should I Compete Again?

Fitness, Lifestyle, Special

So after a few well deserved days off from plan, I’m ready to do it all over, again. It was really nice to sit down and eat with all my family and friends rather than savouring every mouthful alone and thinking what’s on the menu ten minutes later. I’m saying that as though it bothers me, of course, I’d take a meal out over cold prepped food any day of the week, but the reality is, hunger on prep is something you have to embrace, it epitomises the competitive edge in every sense of the word.

Nothing tastes as good as Sunday felt, not just being on stage and relishing months of hard work but feeling sheer content, even now, a few lbs heavier already. While I massively enjoyed having the freedom to eat whatever I wanted, literally a kid in a sweet shop, I was ready to get back into routine the minute I realised that overindulging was far from conducive even in the short term. Freedom of choice as I’ve previously mentioned is a precarious thing, it can be the difference between bitter and sweet, first and last, winning and losing. This is the best shape I’ve ever been in, would do it all over again in a heartbeat, and we’re not even done yet. I don’t think could’ve, would’ve, should’ve done anything, maybe a slightly less relaxed off season of Dominoes next time round, but it only taught me how you can definitely have too much of a good thing.

I look back at some of the photo’s now from the weekend and laugh at myself just how relaxed I was, how I could’ve been so much better and worked harder on stage, but equally relieved that I could do it all with a smile on my face. I made rookie mistakes, and going into it with no expectations of the whole experience in general, I was humbled to say the least. Some of my stronger shots may look like I had the edge over a few other guys in the lineup, and in my honest opinion I’d probably put myself 4th not 6th, but again, what good is complaining and justifying the fact that MY best on the day wasn’t good enough. If I was to win, knowing that I didn’t bring my BEST, what purpose would that serve me? If I was to leave disgruntled at the outcome, not taking something concrete home to justify all my hard work, this process would’ve taught me nothing but a false sense of entitlement.

I think the take away point from the outcome is being granted with the experience to know exactly what I need to work on and what I would do differently next time. I enjoyed every moment being on stage, knowing that every other guy before me and the next had equally sacrificed by some measure, despite being my competition. It would be nice to turn up, wipe the floor with everyone and get a standing ovation, but weighing up the competition it soon became apparent that the prospects of this were unlikely. It was up until that point that I no longer had anything to lose, and everything to gain. I’ve made it this far without the need for a confidence boost or sung praises, merely customary in consolation, I’d take some empathy over loose compliments any day of the week.

When you have to be adamant to say no to people that try to corrupt and question your decision making to do something that they simply can’t or won’t do, out of choice, it’s often difficult to remember that it is equally their choice too.

And then you’ve got ‘The Neigh-sayers’ Of course I recently watched Pumping Iron.

‘But there’s more to life than starving yourself’

‘One drinks not gonna harm you is it?’

‘That’s not much food’

‘You’ve got to let your hair down, SOMETIMES’

I’ve heard it all, some people surprisingly more persistent to get a reaction than other’s, now I merely find it entertaining at what people come out with.

While we can all judge each other’s eating habits and question what is truly healthier, it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks as long as you can justify it to yourself. What if every expense of effort in life could be weighed up instantaneously with the sole benefit that it bears, sooner or later you’d drop everything that didn’t serve you a purpose.

Cardio is the perfect example. Now that it has a place in my routine, and the rewards for my effort can be seen much faster than before, I can no longer justify the extra hour in bed. It would be so much easier to stay in bed and make up for it later on somewhere, but for the sole premise on the benefit and purpose it has, I would be doing myself a disservice if I decided to swerve it. I’ve never been an early bird, If I ever met Mark Wahlberg I’d be the first person to tell him to have a lie in don’t worry. If you could categorise someone that equally resented having to get out of bed, relenting only at the prospect of getting back in, this was me.

Sleep was something I couldn’t live without whilst equally denying myself of it. Rather than getting up and training before work I would finish late and insist on going to the gym regardless of the time. While it almost empowered me knowing that people were settling down for the night and I was training, I justified taking stimulants and pre-workout to rule out any lethargy I’d accrued from a full day of working on someone else’s time. Little did I know how much damage I was doing to myself, sleep deprived and never fully recovered into the next session.

If you want it hard enough, you’ll make it work. I quit my job in retail to become a PT, knowing that it would be hard to sustain through seasonal periods, relying on the wavering whims of willpower that contrast my own. All it takes is a big enough WHY, and there’s your answer every time you’re faced with a question. If you don’t have a justifiable purpose when you it gets hard you’ll clutch at straws and be more likely to crack before you’ve even started. It is by this measure that the purpose of failing or slipping at the first hurdle may save you a lot of time and effort once you’re honest with yourself and just give up. The smaller pursuits may seem tedious and trivial in the vastness of the larger feats, but it’s those bite your tongue and move on moments which satisfy the grandeur of the real journey.

To me, there’s no greater lesson than being humbled, the gift of perspective.

Having a good time is easy, anyone that knows me well knows that I don’t struggle to do so. You’ll never struggle to find an excuse to drink or enjoy a nice meal in company. What you’ll struggle to get back is time, time spent enjoying yourself or time working on what you want most in life. Are you celebrating your life as it is now or do you need to earn it just a bit more to justify the effort you put in?

As for competing for those of you that are interested, my next show is on the 6th October. Thanks for everyone that came to the last one, it made the whole thing worthwhile. As for the next few weeks I’m just going to enjoy the process yet again and see how much further I can push myself before working back up to a more sustainable weight.

Follow the rest of my fitness journey on Instagram @jakedarcyfitness

Jake 💪

 

 

 

 

The Voice and the Ego

Lifestyle

Screen Shot 2018-10-06 at 20.48.01After training for over a decade, one would presume that if there were a key to unlocking our genetic potential, surely, we should have found it by now?

Only in the light of our best selves can we possess the key, to which our fingers and hands bear the strength to turn the handle but the surfeits of our ego can not.

EGO by definition

‘a person’s sense of self-esteem or self-importance.’

So if the ego is by definition our ‘esteem’ and ‘importance’ — The internal conductor which dictates the pace of our present ‘song’ — How then, is this same force silencing the rest of the show?

Ego by PSYCHOANALYSIS

the part of the mind that mediates between the conscious and the unconscious and is responsible for reality testing and a sense of personal identity.

In Freud terms the ‘screening’ process of our thoughts and desires, the outcome to which is determined by whichever part of our ego dominates and decides our further actions.

So if for example we act solely on the ID or ‘pleasure principle’ —unconscious urges and desires— the logical part of the ego may have to pick up the pieces left from the decisions of a somewhat erratic and impulsive accord.

How does this fare in the grand scheme of motivation and further lust for life, when our thirst is quenched, need we drink more?

We live in an age of over-choice, over-thinking and decisions that have further financial bearing on our lives, a generation of hypothetical scenarios that we watch other people play out, envying their conviction whilst defending your own. It is the grace of imagination that will come to either serve us or be our biggest downfall, silencing the ego which holds us back from the risk of failure, or leads us to it.

Ask yourselves how many times you’ve not finished a book, completed a project or silenced a part of yourself which you wished you didn’t? What is talking you out of it? Is procrastination merely a limbo state to which your primitive and logical mind contest to the extent of your decisions or are you just plain lazy? For every £1,000,000 idea that you have just before sleep, is it a resistant logic that detracts you from picking up a pen and writing it down or a deep comfort which propels you further into the pillow and into the subconscious abyss of great ideas. Such a fleeting potentiality of our future artists, writers, entrepreneurs and the like, away from the ‘danger’ of risk, and the impedance of one’s modern survival. Strip away the comforts and masquerade of life and you will find that in order to survive we must evolve beyond the wanton thirst and safety in that which we know to be true. Surpassing the treacle of time into a flow which brings us from the knelt of a stagnant pool and not the dutiful hunt which gives us true purpose.

Conflicts of Interest

Lifestyle, Special

“Jack of all trades, master of none” We are all familiar with this idiom, an individual to which has a broad aptitude for various abilities , though an intrigue with all may come to restrict them from mastering the craft of only one. This is not confined to sport; languages, instruments, and every other skill-set that equips us with a platform for expression and creativity, have all the means of further mastering our own craft by the knowledge we expose ourselves to. It is this exposure which determines how we piece together our own understanding, though it is commonplace for two different people to achieve the same goals whilst veering on a different path…

We live in a densely populated area with a contrastingly vast spectrum of people, each bearing different skill-sets to the point of them seeming obscure and tumultuous alongside our own. It is easy to distance ourselves with those on a different path knowing its gravity, yet it is crucial to understand the direction that they are going in order to to navigate your own. While this void of obscurity is made more manageable by our interactions, things in common and perceived duty of politeness, is it this social middle ground which is controlling our creativity and curbing our crafts?

If you want to learn how to play guitar you wouldn’t ask someone who plays a violin, so why are we all too open to the accept the ideals of people with no constructive bearing or aptitude for the skill-set of your aspirations. This is prevalent at every level of corporate influence whereby the propulsion of targets and goals –you MUST hit x or y by **/**/**– are ushered beyond that of a single constituent, every number must contribute in conjunction with those on the same path in order to succeed. But what if you do not share the aspirations of those numbers? each feat being a thousands grains of sand into the hour/day/year-glass of someone else, your own time to which still bleeds whilst you console and reward yourself with vacuous comforts…

My current conflicts of interest are all dependable on being able to practise each at a sufficient capacity; energy, productivity and creativity being the ingredients to which form this elixir of DOING –at least something about it — but with any potion comes its time sensitivities, side effects and cynicism. If there was a magic pill for creativity and we could all go about our business with the greatest intentions and unequivocal focus, would we pursue our aspirations or would we still be conflicted by the dichotomy of immediate comfort and distant dreams.  By using all energy in one area would in doubt compromise the other. My advice would be to start by putting an hour aside to each thing that you aspire to do without the influence of anything else but your own rationale, then see whether it serves you any such purpose. If that purpose is enjoyment, keep doing it, if that enjoyment is not short lived, make it a routine. If it brings you greater satisfaction make it a hobby. If an hour turns into two, a hobby turns into a passion, and a passion turns into an aspiration, be aware that everything you do and everyone that you give your time to will in turn have bearing on it, whether or not it is conducive to its success, tick tock.

 

 

Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?

Special, Uncategorized

As the boundaries of reality become ever more distorted by days spent staging the next, one can often question if the present is just a passing manifestation of the past as we know it, or the future as we deem it to be. For each second that falls into the vacuum of space, every blink of our genetic makeup ingests the information that keeps us from a mutiny of beasts. Beasts who have shared the kiss of life, endured the roughest climates, but cannot speak of the tales that claim them their birthright. Is evolution a battle to the top of the hill that spills at the summit and melts into skies, purging the soil for fruits that do not seed, birds that do not fly and dogs that cannot bark. Humans that cannot read, Robots that cannot obey. Have our destinies be designed, can our fate be known, are our dreams reality?